So I am sorry I haven't exactly been active lately. I kept meaning too, really, I did! I have just been really busy as of late, had a lot going on. Tonight I felt the need to rant where no one would get into my privacy at home and so.... thus brings me back to the world of deviantART.
Why is it that no one ever seems to be around when you really need them to be? If only they all knew the second you needed them, then you could be sure that at least some of them would be right there at your doorstep (metaphorically of course). But the problem is, when we need someone, we never want to reach out... to ask someone for the help that we need or the support or the shoulder....
My day started out amazing. It really did. I got a new pair of headphones, and I will just say that they do the job very nicely. They have amazing sound quality as well as volume and just look AWESOME. So that was good. Drove up to Medicine Hat with my "sister", just singing and talking, visited a tattoo parlour and everything was fine.
While we were there, though, I started feeling anxious. I don't know why. I just did. I couldn't for the life of me figure out what it was, but I expected it to go away pretty soon.
Actually, the opposite. My mood just went downhill, throughout the day. Now, I am sitting here, feeling almost in tears, and simply trying to remind myself that I'm going to see Leora tomorrow, and hopefully that will give me enough incentive to avoid any recklessness at least until Monday when I get back. Problem is, and I have already made up my mind, I am going to take a bath with my sharpened pocketknife, something which, until a few months ago, I hadn't done in a while.
There is so much to say and unfortunately, no poems to say them with. I have had no desire to write.
Hopefully this weekend I will get some in, but for now..... I have nothing more to say. I will be back soon to fill in the blanks.